The Tambrahm Heartbreak

As I sit down to write this post, I smile the widest smile with a slight wickedness lurking somewhere at the corners of my lips. Oh! I am gonna be mercilessly teased after this post by my friends. I am referring to a very practical scenario, which has the potential to shatter blooming relationships. This aspect is actually the worst fear in every Tambrahm girl or guy. The fear that our crushes and/or lovers being from the same gotram or star.

The problem of same gotram is chronic that our adorable pullais and ponkondhais definitely pray for this to not happen. Generally, we are not allowed to marry within the same gotram, the reason being, people of the same gotram are considered to be siblings. Although there are adequate loopholes to work around this glitch, people don’t prefer to get into such muddle.


Friend (Guy)- *Moping about his “love failure” to me* Meg, how much ever you thrash me with your words, you will never understand the love I have for her.

Me- *All intrigued* Dei, if you have thissssssu much louves on her, why don’t you go and speak up?

Him- There is no chance of this happening, ever, Meg. Rehne De, It’s okay.

Me- *Annoyed* See, don’t give up without even trying. Whatever be the issue, it can be sorted out by dialogues between families… *all such bullshit gyaan that one is filled with during such times of distress to one’s own friends*. Understood? So get off the phone, spare me and dial her damn number and tell.

Him- This problem can’t be solved.

Me-* Apdi enna problem pathi pesindrukan* Anything can be solved.

Him- Really? We are of the same gotram.

Me- *Rightu* *Speechless*

Him- Meg! Meg! Adiye!!!

Me- Sari okay. You continue ranting da. I will listen to you. *with equally glum voice*


Bubbling with excitement of registering on matrimony sites, she and her amma sit together to judge the profiles that the algorithm has the audacity to throw at them. Finally after swiping up ( Not Tinder guys, relax) around 50-60 guys, the one guy she likes, she tells amma that the guy looks good and the profile seems decent. Amma is excited and calls out to appa to convey the same. Our girl, opens the detailed profile and gets the shock of her life. The guy is of the same star as she is.  Amma silent. Appa dangerously silent. Girl frustrated. Case closed.

The reason why I am highlighting this is that while it seems humorous when it happens to others, it really is annoying when it happens to us. Some of us may laugh at it and move on, while some of us may not be able to take that into our heads. This may border on the concept of accepting rejection. Just that, in this case, this is nothing personal at all. It is just not meant to be. Simple.

While we can go on and on about how to face rejection and how to not take it to heart, the fact that remains is that it does hurt. At least a little, in that unknown corner of our consciousness.

I really wish it wasn’t this complicated. I really do, to all those people who got their hopes shattered and also to my dearest friend. I see your pain now. 😉 Come let us go and pray to Umaachi with an additional line at the bottom of our usual list.

What say?




6 thoughts on “The Tambrahm Heartbreak

  1. I really DO understand! what I dont get with this same gothram concept is, though we take our appa’s gothram, how does it become ok to marry someone from amma’s gothram – siblings on both sides right???

  2. அவன் அவனுக்கு பெண் கெடக்கிரதே/காதலி ஆகுரதே கஷ்டமா இருக்கு, இந்த லட்ச்சணத்துல இது வேரயா? 😖

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